oh lord, det är mycket som händer på en gång just nu. fina saker, lite emotionellt bara och så är jag ganska tramsig ibland. MEN ikväll lät jag mig inspireras, eller jag blev rätt oplanerat inspirerad. av mig själv av alla människor.
innan jag lämnade chilcotin holidays fick jag skriva en så kallad staff story om min upplevelse på ranchen, som nu publicerats på wilderness jobs' blogg. som jag följer. och det var bra, jag blev imponerad, inspirerad som sagt, motiverad på nytt av att läsa den. kände att det var rätt bra skrivet och bra sammanfattat.
här är min staff story:
"So, in life a lot of unexpected things appear to happen. I left Sweden
for Canada in early September 2013 and four months later going back my whole way
of seeing the world is different.
I just turned twenty; I am in the middle of experiencing the world with
a traveling heart and a wish to learn something about everything. I was going
to a ranch in North America mainly to work with horses and develop a little bit
as a person hopefully, that was the plan. And here I am, have been working a
bit with horses, yes, but mostly with other things, new things. And have
developed as a person, yes, but not just a little bit, I would more describe it
as a huge bit. An amazing bit!
Before I went to Canada I finished a three years education in
agriculture 2012 and then spent one year working at a couple of different
places, a riding stable in Ireland during the fall, a restaurant in a ski
resort in the north of Sweden during the winter season and a bed &
breakfast/travel agency/café during the summer.
With my education I got to do a lot of working practice so I had quite a
bit of experience of different working environments already and I got to go working
on Iceland in the summer of 2011, so it wasn’t my first time going alone to an
unknown country either. But with that behind me I sort of knew that you never
know how things are going to turn out, whatever picture you have in your head
before you go, it can show up to be completely different.
Chilcotin showed up to be almost as I pictured it actually, on the
surface anyway. Pretty soon I started to discover something else though, after
some talks, some digging, some paperwork (!). The actual search for personal
development in everything, the open-minded thinking, the endless possibilities
to learn new skills. The genius combination of being in the wilderness, in an
environment full of risks, living a lifestyle on the edge and letting people
into this, get them challenges way out of what they’d ever dreamt of. For me it
has become obvious that nothing is more developing than this, if you’re ready
for meeting the unknown, if you can handle it.
And I must say, this is what I think has been most valuable for me. The
change of thinking and the view of possibilities I have now that I didn’t see
in the same way before. Not that I didn’t lived a happy life or had goals and
dreams before, but the feeling is different now, the importance of keeping
focus is more centered and I have a way more clear picture of life, what I want
to do and sort of the way to accomplish it.
My learning process, my challenges started during my second week at the
ranch when I got thrown into the logging work. I had a small experience of
driving heavy equipment before from driving tractors at school and I enjoy it,
but to suddenly be out in the real world, doing real high-risk work in the
forest was different. Scary and challenging, being aware of all dangers and
people working around me, soft, fragile people that wouldn’t have any chance of
protecting themselves from a huge, heavy skidder if I did something wrong.
But I got the chance to choose if I wanted to do it or not, and I
decided to keep going, because I enjoyed and wanted to master it, be able to do
it and feel confident with it. The best choice I could do, when seeing it now,
afterwards. It was a whole new field of skills.
Getting an identity with the logging, being “the loggers” together with
Randy, meant a lot to my self-confidence and opened up my eyes for everything I
could do even though I had no experience of it. The maintenance work of the
skidder was a certain part from the beginning, but that’s when I started
widening my horizon with doing all kinds of mechanics and maintenance work on
the trucks, the backhoe, the snowmobiles.
I felt important; I had a role and hungered to get more. Without really
reflecting at the beginning I searched for things to be responsible for,
projects to lead. And the ranch environment provided it all for me, I just had
to understand it myself.
With all this came the challenge of balancing my time as well, since my
interests wasn’t all about logging and mechanics after all. The will of learning
new skills had grown bigger since coming to the ranch and I tried to make sure
I got to try everything new when a possibility showed up, or I made it happen
myself. So the whole new field concerning the hunting became one of these
things, from knowing nothing I went to study the CORE, get to go out scouting,
handle and shoot with a rifle and tracking.
Other new things was de-shoeing the horses, tracking and herding home
horses from the mountains and training Ranger, the little foal of the wild mare
Cheyenne. I have never been training such a young horse before, but it has been
wonderful to work with him and see his huge steps forward, he is an amazing,
cooperative little horse and he managed to steal my heart totally. With
training him I learned the skills of roping as well, which sure is cool as
hell!
To develop and learn more about the managing part I got thrown into do
coordinating my last month at the ranch, which was a light introduction to any
leader/manager role. With the full time logging at the same time and the little
horse to train it became an even bigger personal challenge trying to handle the
pressure of keeping track of everything, being aware of everything happening at
the ranch and of everybody’s work and interests. A tough one, but sure a well
needed one as well.
To try and summarize it I had a totally outstanding time at Chilcotin
Holidays, counting all different sections, from the people I met to the skills
that I learned and the way I developed on an intellectual and emotional level.
I got inspired and motivated in so many ways from the environment and from the
other staff members.
I will always keep this experience with me and I hope I will return to
Chilcotin to work again, dig deeper into the knowledge of running a business
and take part of the endless stream of possibilities this place provides. Maybe
after half a year, one year, two years, I don’t know for sure. First I’m going
back to Sweden, working a winter season at a completely different place where
I’ve been before, where I already am someone, to see how it affects me, and how
I affect it. How my changed way of seeing life is going to be in an environment
I know from before my Chilcotin experience."
